Already Wanting To Back Out

We are less than two months away from Lillian starting Mother's Day Out, and I am starting to have panic attacks over it. Believe me it is not the program I am worried about, I almost had to convert to Episcopal to get her in at All Saints. And I have made random drop-ins to check out the teachers and the program over the last few months. I LOVE everything about All Saints and have heard nothing but great things about them from other parents, but it is 84 days! 84 days over the course of the school year that I will basically miss with Lillian. Four hours a day, two days a week, 336 hours from August to May that I miss out on. Smiles I don't get to see, laughs I won't get to hear, games and playing that I am not even apart of. A little dramatic I know, but still I can't help it. Drop off is at 9:00 a.m and then I would pick her up at 1:00, only for her to fall asleep in the car on the way home and not wake up from her nap until after 3:30-4:00. Our days are pretty much down hill after that- get dinner ready, clean up after dinner, baths, books, bed. And I can only imagine how hectic that all will become with a newborn strapped to me.

Shaun keeps telling me that she is ready, and that I will enjoy that alone time that Lillian being in MDO will allow me to have with Whitten but still I am beyond nervous about it. I keep telling myself, "She is two Melissa, she is ready for this.." but then I just find myself saying, "exactly, she is ONLY two. And my time is so limited with her....why do I HAVE to send her somewhere". Shaun also made a good point telling me that he thinks it will be nice for her to have her own place...her own space and friends. And I will have special time with Whitten like I got to have with Lillian. Who knows....last year we paid for three months of Parent's Day Out and I took her maybe three times. But this year I am going to try to commit to it, and not freak out over not being with her every second. I am thankful that it starts one month before Whitten is born so she won't feel pushed away when he comes, it will just be routine by then for her to go to school two days a week.

It is something I will continue to pray about and hopefully my anxiety over it all will die down by the time August 10th rolls around. Just imagine what I wreck I will be when she actually starts grade school!

Such A Smart and Funny Girl

Lillian has started to say the funniest things to Shaun and I these days. And the things that she puts together absolutely blows our minds. Here are just a few conversations she had with us today...

This morning Eli and Lillian both wanted a pop tart, so I broke one in half and gave each of them a piece. Lillian pointed to Eli's pop tart and said, "Half 'Li". It blew my mind that she knew that she had a half of something and that Eli had the other half.

Tonight while I was reading Lillian books in bed she interrupted me and said, "Rats Momma...rats in my hair". Then she proceeded to tell me that she need a brush and actually made us get out of bed and go brush her hair. After we had gotten back in bed she looked at me and said, "Rats, my hair no more".

Lillian got out of bed tonight and as I was walking her back to her room she said, "Cuddle Momma one minute". I thought it was so cute she used that phrasing that I caved and said okay. After a minute had passed I told her, "Okay Lillian that was one minute, it is time to go to bed now". To which she responded with a grin, "Cuddle Momma two minutes". I don't know about you, but I thought that was pretty smart for a two year old (barley two) to put together.

Just A Couple Of Funny Pics...

getting ready to go to Mommy & Me Dance



of course we can't leave the house without the babies.

Push Present!

Some of you might have heard of the husband giving his wife a little gift when they have a baby, also known as the "push present". And while I know that Shaun thinks the idea of giving your wife a present just because she had their baby is ridiculous, he decided that sense this little boy is the last sweet baby we will be having it was worth commemorating with a little gift. So this afternoon he took me to get my push present...new wedding rings!!

When Shaun and I got engaged he gave me the most beautiful engagement ring. But when it came time to picking out a wedding band I knew that money was tight and literally choose the cheapest ring in the store. Shaun knew and appreciated this and always talked about one day upgrading my rings for a special occasion. I guess he thought the pending arrival of our son was special enough, so he took my engagement ring and had the stone reset in a new setting with a new wedding band! I was so excited and shocked at Shaun's thoughtfulness and generosity...while he is ALWAYS thoughtful he loves to sit on that checkbook. He also tried to tell me that sense this was technically my push present that I couldn't have them until I handed him our little boy. Thats a whole ten weeks away, and I told him that there was NO way that was happening. I cannot wait to pick them up next week sometime.

And for all you people out there thinking, "poor Shaun doesn't get any kind of present for dealing with a needy pregnant wife for nine months" don't start crying for the man just yet. A few weeks ago Shaun had a little "procedure" done to ensure that Lillian would be the only surprise baby we would ever be blessed with, and for being such a good sport about it he got a new electric guitar and amp.

*while I know that Shaun might not have the rock n' roll look, he actually is really good for a beginner and Lillian, Whitten and I love to listen to him play (I tried to tell him that rock starts don't wear house slippers).

Swimming With Friends

Last Monday we had a pool play date over at our friend Jenny's house with her boys Eli and Sam. We had a lot of fun and it was much easier to swim with the kids when there were a couple of other mommies there to help keep an eye on everyone. Swimming with toddlers can be a little nerve racking, but I am pretty sure we had enough flotation devices on them to keep a small car from sinking. Jenny's pool was great and there was no one there; hopefully we can go back soon!

Lillian LOVES Sam's Bumbo seat...she ate her snack in it last week.

Our OCD Little Girl

Shaun and I have always laughed at Lillian's little quirks, and joked that she might even be a little OCD about some things. Well, I think that these pictures just confirm what we were thinking. At bedtime now she has to line up everything that she sleeps with-her two baby dolls, her giraffe, her lovey, her sippy cup, and of course who can go to sleep without a copy of Good Night Moon. I didn't really think this was too weird; maybe just quirky. That was until I woke up to Lillian fussing in the middle of the night, only to walk in her room and discover that she was getting upset because her "stuff" had gotten messed up while she slept. She was sitting up on her knees lining everything back up in its place. I got the biggest kick out it, and when I went to check on her later in the night I couldn't help but to snap these pictures. Everything was still nicely lined up next to my sweet little girl.

Welcome To The World Shepard!

Alli and Korey welcomed their second SON, Samuel Shepard Nations, three weeks early this past Wednesday afternoon. He was a perfect 6 pounds 3 ounces and is absolutely beautiful. As many of you know Alli and Korey did not know what they were having, and I think we were all surprised when it was announced that Baby Nations was a little boy! Mommy and baby are both doing great and will get to come home sometime today! Already Alli is super Mommy! Watching her juggle both Eli's needs and feeding Shepard in her hospital room yesterday definitely gave me something to aspire to when Shaun and I welcome our newest little addition in September. I don't think Alli will have any problem adjusting to life with two.

Seeing a new life come into this world is simply amazing, and a huge reminder of how great God's love is for us. Alli's pastor visited yesterday and said that he believed, "seeing a new life enter this world is about as close as we can get to seeing God". And I 100% agree with the man!



Boy or Girl?



It's a BOY!

Lillian and Eli spending the night together for the first time!

Me, Lillian and Shepard (sorry....it just a pregnancy side effect)

Lillian and Shepard

Alli and her two BOYS!

hanging out at the hospital visiting Alli and Shepard

Whitten In 3D @ 27 Weeks!

Today we went to have our 3D ultrasound done, and even though Whitten was quite stubborn at first we ended up getting some amazing pictures! He is BEAUTIFUL, and I of course couldn't help but to tear up a little bit at the sight of my son's precious face. At first he was not so into the ultrasound and would not show us anything. But after a little walk around the hospital, some Starbucks and a sweet treat Whitten was a little more cooperative and we got some good pictures of him. The ultrasound lady was very patient with us, and we were there for over two hours! We also confirmed that he is sitting with his head digging in my right hip -where my sciatic nerve is located- which explains A LOT of the discomfort I have been having these last few days. Sunday afternoon I couldn't even walk around the house because I was hurting so badly. Hopefully he will get sick of hanging out there and flip around to a more comfortable position; more comfortable for me anyway. I thought that Whitten looks a lot like Lillian, and so did the ultrasound tech, but that just means another little one who looks exactly like their Daddy.

Seeing Whitten today just made Shaun and I that much more excited and anxious to meet and hold our little boy. But September will be here before we know it, and until then I am just enjoying these last few months of this pregnancy!



look at him smile!

here his eye is actually open...it was amazing to watch him open and close his eyes!

You fill me with joy in Your presence.....

Psalm 16:11

Happy Father's Day!

The day that I married Shaun I was sure that I could not be anymore in love with him than I was in that moment, on that very day. But then flash forward 11 months....On May 15, 2008 I watched Shaun hold our newborn daughter for the very first time. On that day I fell in love with him as a Father. Seeing him with Lillian brings more joy to my heart than he will ever know. God knows how hard Shaun has worked over this past year, and how busy he has been with work and school. Yet some how he has always found time to spend with Lillian. He has never been too tired or too busy to play with her, or to sit and read to her at night. Even when he has late classes he makes sure that he calls at Lillian's bedtime to say goodnight to her.She is so lucky to have him as her Daddy, and I so enjoy watching their relationship grow and evolve. And even though Whitten is not here yet, already Shaun is Fathering him as well. He sets my prenatal pills out every night for me with a glass of water. And he only buys the loaf of bread that has added DHA to it. He lays his hand on my stomach and prays for Whitten; prays for his growth and development, for his safe delivery, for the path that God has already laid out for him. How wonderful it is to hear Shaun praying for our son.

Shaun is kind, compassionate, loving, forgiving, understanding, hard working...all of these qualities make him a wonderful man and Father. But what pushes him over the edge, what makes him an AMAZING Daddy is that he is truly selfless. And that is why I wanted to make his Father's day ALL about him! This morning Lillian and I made Shaun breakfast in bed and gave him his Father's Day gifts- which he loved! After church we went to Ross Bridge for a very yummy lunch and ended up staying to swim (not sure if that is technically allowed but we did it). Lillian had a great time in the pool and the weather was SO nice! On the way home we stopped and picked up a Jim N Nicks chocolate pie-as if this pregnant lady needs anymore treats- and headed home to spend the afternoon together. I hope Shaun knows how much he means to this family. We could do nothing without him and I am forever grateful for the Father that he is to our children. They could not be anymore loved by him.

Happy Father's Day Shaun....We LOVE You!

a quick picture before church





of course we couldn't leave for church w/out two babies, three books, sunglasses and her Keens...



she read to her baby dolls the whole way.

trying to get a picture with Daddy, but she was too distracted by the pool

doing a little dancing at lunch

throwing toys to Daddy

Fun Pictures From This Weekend

After a VERY busy week of play dates and fun outings Lillian and I were both exhausted, so Friday we decided to just stay home and relax. Lillian enjoyed just being home and playing with her baby dolls, while I got to catch up on some house hold chores that I had neglected over the week. As much fun as we have meeting up with friends and going to fun summer activities, it was nice just be home and hang out with my little girl.

Lillian decided that she needed to sit on the coffee table while I vacuumed.





watching Daddy take things to the garage Saturday morning.


while blowing some bubbles...

over at Eli's house to play in the pool.

eating Backyard Burger before playing

they didn't get to play long before it started storming